Fat people - Don’t try to blame your fatness on genetics. You’re fat because you eat like a fatass and you want to be fat. Don’t eat like a big fat cow and you won’t be a big fat cow. Ever hear of anorexia? Try getting it. That’ll solve your "fat" problem. If that doesn’t work, try bulimia. Maybe you might vomit your stomach and then you’ll never have to eat again. Just live off your big hulking mass for the rest of your life and hopefully you’ll be skinny.

Tree hugging hippies - Fuck you guys. You know what? Everytime I see people protesting to save trees and nature and shit like that, when I go to take a shit I make sure to use extra extra extra amounts of toilet paper to wipe my ass just so the trees get chopped down faster. Yeah you hippie fucks, I'd like to see you try to recycle paper thats got my ass mud all over it!

Dashboard Confessional - Dashboard has got to be the pussiest panziest emo faggot music I have ever had the displeasure of hearing. Some fag with a high voice singing about his bitch of a girlfriend. "oh boo fucking hoo I’m going to cry she’s so mean." Just do what the rappers do and punch her bitch ass face black and blue. Don’t trouble us with your second rate music. And all you dumb fags who think you have problems or issues may think you’ve been in love or had your heart broken so all you do is listen to this crap all day and write about it in your stupid Xangas about how fucking sad you are because so and so is sticking his penis in someone else or because the bitch you want is having someone elses penis in her. Get over yourselves and this short ass faggot pretty boy and his crap music. Cry me a fucking river.

Anime Conventions - Now if this has got to be the most pathetic show of human life. Grown men and women spending money to dress up as their favorite anime characters. Who the fuck do you think you're impressing? Like someone's going to sleep with you because you have a really well stiched kimono? Or they'll be like "oh it's Goku your really sexy let's go fuck in one of the booths" haha in your dreams. Anime conventions are like one great big display of social excrement at the bottom of the barrel of society but they all get together to play dress up and buy toys and movies and other usless shit that makes you feel like you're important and like you've accomplished something when really it's all a cheap supplement for the fact none of you ever get laid. No, I take that back. Some of these desperate losers do get laid by the end of the convention by each other which hardly counts because losers fucking losers is hardly an accomplishment. But when you think about it even some guys at the conventions don't get any ass either. How fucking pathetic to be the loser of the convention of losers. haha laugh with me it's probably you mother fucker!

Band geeks - Now here’s the biggest club of fags at schools. They’re like a fucking cult. Band kids hang out with only band kids like they’re the fucking Micky Mouse club or something. And oh yeah, they go on trips? Like that’s some big deal? oohhh but there’s girls and stuff. Yeah, who would want to fuck a band geek bitch? It’s not as if you pisshead nerds would know what to do if you were even in a room alone naked with a chick. "stick it where?"

Beat boxers - These are those fucks that make noises with their mouths. Wake up dumbass, you’re not a musician. Just because you can make noises with your mouth doesn’t make you talented. We can all do that shit boom boom chicka tppgughbhuuhbfuck you! I know girls that can do much better tricks with their mouth. You want to bust a beat? Learn to play the fucking drums. Get a real talent. Don’t be some pussy with cupped hands getting your nasty spit all over the rest of us.

Punk kids - You punk kids are all fags with your stupid guitars and bracelets and shit. All hanging out together at school or at punk shows pretending you’re better than the nerds when deep down you’re the same antisocial, lifeless fuck. I mean, "oh we’re punk and we don’t care about rules or fitting in because we’re such rebels" and all that stupid crap. Do you think anybody cares? So you think you’re cool? Well no one else fucking thinks so. You wish you could hang out with the jocks and cheerleaders, but you’re just the group of loser kids who wear the weird clothes who daddy never loved who end up flunking out of school and serving burgers and fries. "Yeah it’s all about the music man," well maybe you should sit down and listen to what it sounds like because your music fucking sucks. You should find something else to do with your useless life. 

Soccer - Seriously, what kind of stupid sport is this? A bunch of grown boys or girls running around an open field chasing after a ball, and it’s not like anyone’s scoring points. They just run around for 90 minutes back and forth over and over. "What an exciting game, the score is 0 to 1." That’s not exciting dumb fuck. Sounds more like a waste of time.

People who watch soccer games - Could you people seriously come up with anything better to do? At least the guys on the field are getting excercise, but you’re just sitting on your fat ass watching them run back and forth. And you actually paid good money to see the damn "game."

Girls who like soccer guys - I mean how stupid can you get? So he’s good at kicking a ball around a grass field. And now you’re going to make posters and shit with his jersey number and scream out "Jensen I love you!" at his games? I mean, do you think any of those guys notice your ugly fat face anyway? You’re just another person in the crowd. Do you think you even have a remote chance of any one of them loving you? Just stick to getting off on your Brad Pitt posters and leave the so-called "athletes" alone.

Goth fags - I hate those people who pretend to be all angsty and shit and all dark by wearing all black, having spikes and wearing fishnets. I mean, who are you trying to impress? So you bought all your shit from Hot Topic. $50 pants wooo fucking hoo. And what the hell is your music supposed to be? All screaming and yells like you’re supposed to be some big shot when in reality you’re all skinny faggots or fat over-weight girls squeezed into tight mini-skirts and fishnets. Fish nets? They should be called hold my fat ass whale blubber nets.

Gothic posers - Okay, the goth kids are bad enough, but then there are some of you dumb preppy fucks who actually think you want to be like them. "ooh I got Spongebob patches," or "oooh I got safety pins on my bag," so instead of spending all your money at the Gap like you normally would, you go to Hot Topic and waste all of your parents hard earned cash there. So what, you think you’re trendy? I mean goths are bad, but the little pussies who pretend to be goths are a whole lot worse.

Goths at the mall - I saw a few of these a couple weeks ago. It was pretty funny because they were all hanging outside of Hot Topic eating Dip and Dots comparing all the different crap they bought or stole from Hot Topic. It’s kind of hard to be a tough bad ass if you’re eating ice cream at the mall. Aren’t you kids supposed to stay away from crowded places and sunlight?

Special Ed kids - I know you retards won’t be reading this anyway so I won’t have to worry about what I write. To the rest of you, they’re a waste of money right? I mean look at your school. They’re probably doing thousands of dollars of construction work so one or two brain dead cripples have an easier time getting from floor to floor. What about the rest of us? Have you seen public school textbooks? They’re out of date, falling apart, or have swearing on every page with dumb shit phrases like "Bloodz 4 lyfe." All you little ankle biters took all the funding just so everyone gets a "fair" shot at getting an education. But how’s that fair? If more money is being spent on about 1% who needs more help then what the hell happens to everyone else? You don’t steal food from all the healthy people just to try to feed the skinny ones. You know what? You little fuck up babies should be put to sleep. Save everyone some money. All they’re going to probably do is end up working at McDonalds and screwing up things for the rest of us. I bet you won’t even be able to get my order straight you drooling sack of shit. I say you get put to sleep immediately. You fucks are probably all shocked and shit, but try ordering saliva covered popcorn from a retard working the concession stand at the movies. One day I’m going to have a cleansing day just like Hitler, only I’m going after you tards. Be ready freaks.

The color orange - I mean, who the hell wears orange? It’s an ugly color and it makes you stand out like a big ugly piece of orange crap. If you really need attention go get a therapist or go to a punk show. Or be one those goth fags and wear all black and shit.

Yugioh cards - Is this stupid or what? Pokemon, Yugioh, Star Wars, Magic? I mean I thought all you nerds who play this crap were supposed to be smart? Haven't you realized they're all the same god damn thing? They just release another trend every five years and all you anti social freaks toss out your old cards and rush to the stores to buy a new card game. I mean jeeez if youre not gonna have a social life you might as well play something fun. Go buy a Gameboy or something.

Xanga emo kids - Well that’s about every single fucking one of you. So quick to cry or complain when something in your life isn’t going right, and it’s almost always about some girl or guy that you "love." Yeah, it’s in the quotes you post because most of you fuckers don’t even know what the damn words mean. Your boyfriend is a dick to you and he hits you and calls you a bitch "but I loooooooooooove him" and your slut girlfriend is fucking every single other guy out there and lying to you about it "but I looooooooooovve her." Or the guy doesn’t even notice you and never will unless you kill yourself and then he’ll probably show up at your funeral just like every single social event like he goes to for love, and he’ll end up getting head from one of your close friends in the bathroom while your parents are weeping over your dead body, but you "looooooovvvve him," or it's the girl who you want because all the other guys want to fuck her and she’s already said no seven times but you still call her up and she says she has to go to bed at 7 'oclock, but you "loooooovve her." I could go on and on with all these bullshit stories about how your lives are and eventually I would stumble across something that actually rings true about you. Almost every single God damn fucking Xanga is about some kid whining about how their life is turning out. Get over yourselves. No one fucking cares. The only reason you’re getting eprops is because those selfish fuckers want you to go back and read their Xanga and care about their life and give them eprops. But deep down no one fucking cares about anyone else unless maybe they’re trying to get lucky with them. These commenting assholes don’t give a shit and they all just want to watch you suffer because it’s comforting to know other people hurt like them or they’re just glad their life isn’t as pathetic as yours. Of course they’ll tell you it’ll be all right, but they’re probably tired of hearing you whine, and if they told the truth and said "you will be miserable until the day you die and it’s your own damn fault," then you probably wouldn’t be friends with them anymore. 

Maddox - What a fuckin fraud! All you dumb fucks follow him like he's the god damn messiah! So the guy writes a few pages about shit he hates and making fun of people. "oh maddox is so smaart" "oh hes so cleever" and then all you unoriginal pricks walk around school quoting him like hes the fucking bible! hmm I wonder what other mother fucker is bad ass enough to do that? oh right thats me. hello world. This is me. Fuck you Maddox.

Fags who carry guitars around school - The whole reason they seem to do it is just to get attention because they’re "musicians." Ever see any of them whip it out and actually play it? No, they just need to walk around with the case. Who fucking knows, it might even be empty. Like some chick is going to sleep with you just because she thinks you can play the guitar good?

Drag queens - What the hell is wrong with you people? Just because daddy molested you doesn’t mean you have to wear mommys clothing. Like this dude named Kaleo. And yeah, I said dude because that’s what you are. Take a peek between your legs on a day when you’re not tucking and you’ll see what I mean. You were born with a dick, deal with it.

Peope whu domt spel gud - I hate u fukas.

Rappers - They’re like singers minus the singing. So you can rhyme a few words. So can Dr. Suess and he made "Hop on Pop" a best selling childrens book. If you can rhyme like that why don’t you write a book too? "Rap on crack." I mean all these rappers talking about how they lived in the ghetto and bustin caps and killing people, and then when they make it big they talk about how much money they have and how many chicks they fuck or how big their car wheels are. If they lived that way then fine, but seriously for the rest of you wannabe rappers you probably don't even live in the ghetto. You probably live in middle class middle income area and are white or asian. So what are you going to rap about? "School is hard and shit yeah yeah yo yo dawg." What hardship have you had in your life? "My girl dumped me and it was sore so she’s a whore, walked out my door so I went to the store and bought some shit that I needed then I cried on the floor." What’s there to really rap about in your life? When’s the last time you got shot at? Ha, you sell weed? I bet you think you’re some hardcore drug dealer now huh? Up there in the real ghetto they sell people. Deal with that "dawg."

Rappers who make up their own words - I mean what the fuck is this? Just because you grew up in a poor neighborhood suddenly you get to make up words for the english language too because your on TV now? fo shizzle dizzle muther fucker jizzm drizzle! Or how about I like it when you do it right thuuur right thuuuur. If you thought I was ignorant, picture people saying this shit. Whats worse is the little white boys and girls who pick up on this crap and start spouting it off like they're real words. I mean its bad enough all you can rap about is drugs cars hos and guns now you have to fuck up english too? Yes the english language naturally evolves over time but are these ignorant two bit rappers the types of guys you want changing our vernacular for the future? Hell no.

The Passion of the Christ - I mean hmmm lets think of a movie from a fictional book and try to make it all dramatic. "Let's seeee, there will uh be a guy and people will hit him and other people will cry and then he'll fall down and make sad faces." Then repeat this for two hours. Boom! Now you have The Passion of the Christ. Mel Gibson is not a fuckin' genious. I could film people crying and a guy carrying a piece of wood. It's just that all you idiots are the sheep who follow crap like this and pay for it too! Even worse you leave the movie feeling guilty and buy bibles and pins and crosses and shit to try to make up for it. If that isn't fucking propaganda i dont know what is. Why doesn't Jesus run for president if hes so awesome. I mean how dumb are you going to sound. "oh yeah I couldn't find God on my own but then I sat down in front of a TV and then suddenly it was all clear to me." Is reading too fucking hard for you people? You know it's based on a book right? Don't just sit on your ass like a lazy fucker watching a big screen and pretend its all spiritual.

Christian TV stations - Now if this isn't the biggest load of bullshit I've ever seen. Christians are supposed to be helping people but with all the money they could have used to feed starving people and cure aids instead they make a mother fucking tv show and not just one no no that wasnt enough they need to have two. Now who the hell watches this stuff? I'll tell you who, lonely suicidal people or really old people. Now if someone's gonna kill themselves why the hell would you want to stop them? If they die that means more food and air and chicks for me. Go ahead and fucking kill yourself. And those people on TV lie, there is no salvation. Now old people I understand. They need something to believe in and this whole "God" thing is very comforting for someone whos going to die in a couple of days or months. But seriously did they really need a fucking TV show? Why not just give them a card or something that says "hey old fucker your gonna die but its okay, Jesus loves you." Save some money and at the same time piss off those tree huggin hippies too. Cut down a whole rain forest just to make those end of your life cards.

Jesus fucks - All of you Jesus fucks who are so afraid of going to hell are all hypocrites. Pretending to be all holy and righteous and shit when in reality you’re sluttier and meaner than the rest of us. Who exactly are you trying to impress here? You put faith in someone you can’t see or can’t hear, but he’s still everywhere. Sounds a bit looney to me. And all the non-Christians are the wrong ones? We’re sinners for not believing in some invisible cartoon character so we’re all going to hell? 

Student government bitches - Now you silly whores make me mad. You spend six fucking years of your life pretending to care about something you hate just to make some stupid college think you give a damn about the world. You evil broads are in control of everything schools do and it makes me pissed. Oh yay you painted some fucking posters and blew up some balloons. Big fucking deal.

Little sissy Student Council boys - Now these guys are worse than power hungry bitches. They’re little little puppies on a leash doing everything their masters tell them to do. The girls have all the power and you whipped fucks do whatever they tell you to do probably because you think you’re going to get laid. Fuckin’ wearing grass skirts and shit at assemblies. Don’t you have any dignity? Ever wonder what life would be like if you took control of it and stopped letting some bitch push you around?

Upperclassmen - Who the fuck do you punks think you are? So you're a little older, yippie. What gives you any right to think you're some sort of badass shit? Most of you are just cocky red haired scrawny fucks with no friends who end up hanging out with sophomores anyway. Hillarious I tell you.

Freshmen - Now you kids are just dumb. I have no idea why any of you little scrawny faggot guys think you have any chance whatsoever with any of the upper classmen girls. If they’re not giving it up to guys their own age what makes you think they’ll give it to you? And you Freshmen girls, dating Seniors thinking they actually give a damn about your flat chest "oh but he loves me." No you dumb cunt, he’s trying to get your cherry. "But we have deep conversations." Yeah, guys will say anything to get laid.

Racer pricks - Seriously, you guys make me laugh. Ever been to the mall and seen some ugly skinny faggoty fuck with terrible acne and some cheap ass haircut driving some really nice car? Just because nobody likes the person you are what makes you think owning something nice will change that? If you’re ugly, putting four wheels and metal around that ugliness isn’t going to change it. "oooh leather interiors" Ha, like you’re ever going to get anyone even worth porking in that back seat of yours? Didn’t think so because deep down you know when it comes down to it, you’re an ugly mother fucker.

Flip racers - I actually had to break it down into different ethnicities because I hate each of you in a different way. So, you all know the type this is, the Oakley sunglasses, spikey hair with a tail and a badass cocky cunt attitude. They spend all their extra money (which isn’t much) supping up their cars. I’ve got no problem with people having a hobby, but when all you have in your life is your stupid automobile then that’s pretty sad. And then they get some Kanji stickers painted on the back window. Hello? You’re Filipino, use your own damn language dumbass. Oh wait, do Flips even have a written language? Nah, I guess not. Their society never evolved that far.

Asian racers - Now these guys are even worse than the Flips. You know the cocky pretty boy with the little gottee who gets all his money from mommy and daddy, or more like step mommy and step daddy for his fucking car. At least Flip racers work hard for their cash. You guys are just spoiled little cunts. And they walk around school with their racer magazines when most of them aren’t even old enough to drive. Stupid Sophomore Freshmen posers. Putting pictures of cars in your Xanga or on your folder at school trying to be a badass racer when the closest you’ve come to driving are those little racer games at the mall.

Samoan racers - Five Soles in a volkswagon Beetle. nuff said.

Fat people in groups - Ever try to pass a group of fat people at school or at the mall? It’s hard isn’t it? They’re more like a herd than a group. They’re like a bunch of fat cows who you can’t quite get around because they walk side by side with their fat arms flapping about as they waddle their fat asses in whatever direction they are heading. Maybe if I had a foghorn I could get the fat fuckers to move faster. Or maybe if I had a cheeseburger they would speed up.

Myspace and Facebook - This is just a bunch of people with no lives making "friends" with people they don't even know or talk to, and they try to facilitate their reason to be able to call them friends by posting bulletins telling their "friends" to " look at pictures of me" and "Leave me comments." It's actually like Xanga. And what's with all these people saying their Myspace is for serious relationships and dating. Fuck you. You aren't going to meet the love of your life over the internet. Maybe you would meet your significant other if you got your ass off the god damn computer and went out in the real world instead of typing to people to leave you comments and make you feel like people actually like you. People on the internet are just friends waiting to happen? Yeah right, either that or a rape in a dark alley is waiting to happen. Fucking Assholes. And if you have something to say to your "friends" that made you get a Myspace so you can feed their narcissism, just fuckin' talk to them on the phone or hang out with them, unless you're the kind of jackass who has to constantly beg people to hang out with you. You know you're pathetic when you decide to be friends with people you've never met based on a 200x200 pixel picture and a few words about how awesome and hot they are.

Ebonics - How politically correct white-guilt ridden pussy liberals pretend uneducated blacks aren't as retarded as they sound. It's a dialect, not a language, and every race probably has a stupid dialect, so this isn't racial issue. This is an education issue, and stupidity anywhere isn't changed by giving it a fancy name and making it acceptable. ya dig?

A Walk to Remember - This one of the dumbest movies ever. You idiots get all sappy and swoon over that dumb guy for marrying that chick just because she has cancer. Hello! Shes going to fuckin' die in a year or two. How hard is it to marry a chick who's going to be around for less than two years? Plus you get to fuck her all you want because you're married to her. Plus she's in her prime and he's in his prime as young horny teenagers and she's gonna die so she'll want to fuck a whole lot. How is this such a hard decision to make for that guy? I mean anyone with two balls in their sack will know, build her a fuckin' telescope and get all the ass you want. I wish I could marry someone who's got cancer. Lucky fucker.

Fatties on the stairs - Can you fuckers find a bench? I mean you people aren’t exactly trim or slender and yet you think it’s right to sit your fat asses in the stairwell where everyone has to pass by. Maybe lugging that bulk of an ass around school is hard, but like I said before, there’s a sickness called bulimia out there, so go find it. If you were skinny then I wouldn’t give a fuck if you sat on the stairs because I could walk right on, but the fact of the matter is, you aren’t and I have to squeeze in between your bulging sides just to get to class. One day I’m going to take a leak on the stairs and watch it trickle down all over you fat fucks. Piss on your overalls? Awwww, boo hoo. I guess you’re going to have to go to the swap meet and buy some more.

Internet quizzes - Now this shit is complete and total crap. First off, who has the time for these quizzes anyway? You could be using the internet to do medical research and find a cure for cancer or tardness, but instead you fuckers spend your time making tests to find out which care bear you are or which sailor scout you’d most want to fuck or what Disney faggot you’d be in a past life. Secondly, and this is what makes me laugh. You fuckers who do take the tests actually cheat. You already know which person or what result you want and you keep retaking the test so you can get what you want just so you can stick the little fucking picture in your Xanga and say "hehe I’m Ranma, isn’t that neat?" Or "I’m Sailor Venus," or "I’m the fuck you Care Bear," and you pretend like it was all some clever coincidence to reflect what type of person you are, but in reality you set the whole thing up which is exactly what Xanga is all about. Being fake to the whole world and letting them see the display you’ve put on for everyone. These tests are just one more way for you to try to shape the way the world sees you, but you’re plastic just like everyone else if you care so damn much what other people think.

If you disagree with anything I've said, feel free to express your disapproval by not giving me eprops and leaving nasty comments.

Do you like the eprop game? Yes, I love the eprop game. Here's what you do. First you find some dumbshits xanga. You give him or her a comment. You dont give them any eprops because usually people just write some dumb shit entries about nothing "boo hoo my life isn't perfect" "boo hoo i dont get laid enough" "boo hoo my grandfather has cancer from smoking even though there are specific labels on the boxes." Anyways, you leave a comment on someones Xanga and then you find their idiot friends who also leave them comments and eprops to make them feel like someone actually cares about them and they're not some lonely shit who cries themself to sleep. Yes, friends are so important because they will give you eprops, and prove to the rest of the world that you aren't some pathetic loser who will die all alone, and it lets you decieve society that people actually care about you, when in truth they just want you to give them eprops so they can tell the same lie to the world. Anyways continuing the eprop game, you go to that persons friends Xangas and do the same thing. Leave a comment and no eprops. You keep going to their friends different Xangas (you find new ones with each new Xanga you enter) until you find that one pathetic loser who has no comments (which really means he has no friends and the world doesn't give a fuck about him.) Anyway when you reach a dead end you start the game all over again.

The fun part about this game is when people start giving you comments back. They become sad because you didn't give them eprops and must investigate what type of sick twisted person you must be for not giving eprops when cleary eprops are free. So they go to your Xanga and give you comments and eprops (to try to make you feel like giving them eprops next time). But instead you just play the eprop game some more. And then with all the eprops you have saved up you can turn them in to Xanga for buttsex. Kinda like fun factory tokens. But when you're a fuckin' god like me you don't need eprops. You just make them out of thin air. Like poof here are eprops and shit. And later when you need to get a job you can put "I got five hundred fucking eprops on my Xanga" as part of your resume. They'll hire you for sure.